Author: Josh
Bio: He writes this blog
- Lift the ban on endzone dances
- Establish universal standard scoring settings for fantasy football
- Make public transit to the game the easiest thing in the universe
- Price discount for people who wear the home team’s home jersey to the game
- Have more fun at the expense of people who wear the visiting team’s jersey to the game
- More stadium traditions akin to the Bleacher Creature Roll Call
- “Happy Hour” drink & concession stand specials for people who get to the game early
- Move all All-Star Games to the end of the season. Get rid of World Series homefield BS. Teams drafted pickup style like NHL
- More on-field/uniform ads, less TV timeouts
- Sports crossover All-Star Games (ie, NL vs. NFC in a game of basketball)
- Fix the NFL’s field goal/last-second-timeout disaster. Preferably, before somebody gets injured on a play that didn’t count
- No kicking in the NFL All-Star game
- Less kicking in the NFL, in general
- You can only introduce a new jersey for your team once per decade
- Do anything to fix the NBA Hall of Fame because it’s a complete trainwreck disaster
- Space Jam 2
- The Soundtrack to Space Jam 2
- Every copy of Sandlot 2 and 3 buried in a massive landfill
- Anyone suspected of doing steroids in baseball can’t be elected to the Hall of Fame. Instead, they may be elected to the Hall of Phlegm
- Smaller MLB bullpens, more instances of position players having to pitch an inning
- Zambonis that can be used to clean/wax basketball courts during intermissions, too
- No more overtime losses that count as 1 point in hockey. No more shootouts at the end of tied games, either
- At the end of the NHL Postseason, the Scott Niedermayer Trophy for the player with that spring’s best playoff beard
- Salary cap loopholes/provisions so that it’s easier for teams to keep tenured players / All-Stars seeking paydays / Lebron James
- NHL Skills Competition events for fighters, too
- I have no idea what channel the Versus Network is; why can’t I set my DirecTV so that it’s always channel 3 (or whatever)?
- Related: Kill the Versus Network
- Sports league commissioners are tenured the same way we tenure our President: four year terms, two terms max, entry by popular vote
- Related: Don’t publicize the fact that voter turnout for sports commissioner elections will probably be higher than that of presidential elections
- Jesus Christ allow NFL and MLB clips on Youtube already